A Poet and a Prophet: What's that in your vape?

Poetry of Plants' first column predicting the future of the cannabis industry; Box Brown illustrates

Let Poetry of Plants forecast the future of the cannabis industry…

In his first fortune-telling missive, he predicts more chemicals.

Thank You For Not Testing

Surprise, surprise! Vape producers have been slipping you parts per billion of bug spray. Are you huffing insecticide or vaping THC distillate? 

Who knows! Who knows how much of it affects us in any meaningful way? We also don’t know how long these tainted products have been sold. Vaping is essentially heating, not burning, which definitely sounds safer. We do know, however, that the chemicals found at microscopic levels in cannabis, when concentrated, are very toxic.

Maybe our bodies are like the ocean—an estimated 175,000 tons of plastic float along the shoreline and surface layer of the sea. An estimated 1.4 quintillion tons of water fill our oceans. I couldn’t find a calculator that would compute a percentage with 18 zeros, so let’s say it’s safe to assume that the amount of plastic is way less than parts per billion and yet has an observable and undesirable effect. With vaping, the bodily systems that function as filters for toxins are bypassed, and whatever chemicals are heating into a gas are readily absorbed into the bloodstream and into the ocean that is our body. It’s not apples to apples, but there could be a parallel effect for us. A microscopic tank mix of chemistry builds up over time on the shores and surfaces of our internal organs—death by a thousand puffs.

Who knows how many have the bandwidth to care. Giving a shit about all the compounding chemical exposures during our days and lives would require a lot of bandwidth. It would require a novel approach to society, and at the moment, enough people are demonstrating a primitive approach to protest and change. A chemically laced level of performative violence, emotional intelligence, and irrational thought. Not an inspiring sign.

There is hope, though. More chemicals.

Made to fix the damage caused by the creation of war and the progress birthed from flattening occupied areas of the earth. Life extension therapy, the Hail Mary pass from Ares, could keep us alive long enough to grasp the current situation. It also leads to a whole lot of unexpected situations. 

Like one where you could vape for another 400 years.

What happens if the DCC acts like a functioning department?

The current California adult-use cannabis program will collapse. The liability is somewhat spread across all types of businesses, and the market has only survived by existing between the rules. It is not just one part of the market but a mess of noncompliance. The problem with the DCC functioning for the state government is that every action will also tear apart a healthy chunk of the regulations, requiring a broad updated rule set.

With sizeable international tobacco and beverage companies feeling the hit of today’s volatile world, whatever laws and regulations are updated will likely be guided by their hand. This is evident in how hemp is being regulated. In a way, the more prominent, more powerful, unseen actors looking to scoop up an expanding market of cannabis consumers do not need licensed cannabis any longer if they can keep filling up the gas in the hemp market’s tank. 

Are there strict testing rules on toxic chemical constituents in the hemp industry? Not really; there is a hyper-focus on various cannabinoids but not much talk or inspection of what’s in a hemp-branded vape or other product. Also, we live in an era where governmental agencies and other civic institutions are trusted less, which leads to a creeping ineffectiveness. So when the FDA speaks, it doesn’t always land. In general, this is not great. What is created next will serve the interests of whichever entity holds the most power and capital authority. At some point, the black market will either be outcompeted by the hemp industry or folded in. 

So, the only real thing of value the licensed world of cannabis has for consumers is cleaner products and trusted brands with some time on the market. The idea of that might be the only thing that matters; the actuality of it is what we should strive for because, at some point, it will matter. It is best to send the worst actors in the licensed space as fast as possible through the door, where they might find themselves left only to join the hemp industry.

The higher the number of bad actors in the hemp space, the more likely it will fall apart faster. That is unless consumers just don’t care, and if that is where we are, we have bigger problems than dirty vapes and chodes yelling ‘Fake News’ into the screen of their phones when they get caught tank mixing liquid death into distillate carts.

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Nelson Lindsley is a cultivator, consultant, and weed industry meme lord. You could call him an influencer, but I think he’d be annoyed by that. Anyway, here’s his new flower drop with Catalyst, available throughout California.

Brian “Box” Brown is a comic artist, cartoonist, author, and illustrator.

And now they are both Cannabitch columnists. How auspicious for them!

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Scooby Snacks…

I published a fun essay about finding acceptance in being a stoner in High Times the other day. It’s not genius shit, but I did get a lot off my chest.

Weed smokin’s-a-comin’ to the California State Fair.

LOL. Lester Black really hated Planet 13 in Orange County.

As the rest of the California industry struggles, apparently, Santa Barbara cannabis is booming.

Hawaii is tinkering with an expungement program.

This new UN report on global drug trends posits that legalization in the U.S. and Canada may have helped to shrink the size of ex-legal markets while at the same time preventing many people from being arrested on cannabis charges. Honestly, I’m just not sure if the former is true, but it’s an interesting read. It also notes a “psychedelic renaissance,” which is true, but I’m also not going to be caught dead saying the corporatization of psychedelics is any “renaissance.”

Fake labor unions continue to plague the cannabis industry.

The North Carolina Senate is making moves on legalization despite political brouhaha.

Marijuana rescheduling won’t fulfill Biden’s campaign pledge to decriminalize, says this op-ed piece by Cat Packer.

Donnell Alexander of West Coast Sojourn interviewed his old boss, Alex Halperin, otherwise known as WeedWeek, and, at the moment, probably better known for being one-half of the reporting duo of the LA Times Vapegate 4.0-and-counting investigation. (I’ve also reported for WeedWeek.)

Vapegate Round 8 Million is causing lawsuits, and the California DCC formally recalled products that failed testing many months ago.

Minnesota raided businesses suspected of illegally selling hot hemp.

Medical sales will soon begin in Ohio.

Guess who doesn’t want to deschedule? The GOP.

Writer Jessica Reilly-Chevalier wrote in after the last issue about neurodivergence and cannabis to share some additional resources: Here’s Jessica’s interview series with an endocannabinoid pharmacology expert, cannabis nurse, neurodivergence educator, and two pharmacists discussing a variety of concerns like high doses of THC, THC's biphasic effects, and the need for neurodivergent people to balance cannabinoid intake and not get stuck on THC dominance.

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